I went on my Facebook page and after what took me like forever; I eventually managed to change my display picture. My friends have been telling me to change the picture; hence, I decided to do so and also add a few things on my Facebook page. Barely few mins later, my friends started liking and leaving all manner of comments. I decided to check who was online, as I had quite a bit of time on my hands so that I could catch up with some people.
A friend of mine who had
liked the picture was online so, I started sending messages to her. She didn’t respond to my messages so I figured she was busy. I had other friends to chat with, so I just thought to type all the messages and send at once so that once she had the time to, she’d respond to them.
She finally responded but the response shocked me. I immediately went back to her page to be sure I was having the right chat with the right person. There’s been a lot of hacking of accounts; hence, I wanted to be sure her account hadn’t been hacked.
‘Mrs. A’ and her husband share both the same first name & surname (Of course, they’re married so they should bear the same surname) and I happen to have both of them as friends on my page. The first response I got from all my chat shocked me…’ Hello ‘Shade, this is not Mrs. A’ and it followed with ‘This is Mr. A’. I realized that her account hadn’t been hacked but I quickly went back to the chat history to be sure that I hadn’t mis-yearned/over-yearned/ jam talked and thankfully, I hadn’t. As a matter of fact, I had asked of him and told her to thank him for taking good care of her. It later occurred to me that I once had a chat with him on her yahoo messenger page.
I ended the chat and just had one thing on my mind. Will I allow my husband have access to my social media/mail accounts?
Will you do this/ R you doing this?
Let’s discuss, what do you think?
FolaShade
Well, to each his own o. To me, why would my husband be interested in my girly gossips with my friends and even reading my mails. There are some mails my blog readers send that are really confidential and even though we are one with oga, I want to be the only one reading.
In my eyes, there is something called A MAN'S WORLD and another one A WOMAN'S WORLD, shikena. Hubby already feels like "all women do when they meet is gossip" so why would I let him into all my gossips and YES sometimes we talk a little about our husbands.
I won't be comfortable if I send my friend some kind mail and then say her husband replies on her behalf or try to chat with her and get a response from her husband instead. Ha, what if we are very close and I freely asked after her night?
Nooooo.
Hubby is too busy to check his own sef so where is the time to come ask for mine???
I know some couples agree to exchange all that o and it's fine but me o, I won't abeg. Hubby only has access to read my blog like other readers and if he is not in town and sees something he'd like to respond to, he sends me a mail or just yabs me about it on phone. He hardly even has time to check except when I become too busy blogging.
I like my privacy whether married or not and I remember how I used to snoop around hubby's phones and all back then but when I realised he doesn't even pick my calls, looks for me with my ringing phone or tells me I have a missed call and that's all. I got tired of one sided snooping and checking phones jare. I once asked for his ATM pin which he gave me without even asking for mine and after a few days I forgot the number sef and that's it.
If your husband is interested in your mail accounts, it's not a bad thing but me I no do am o. A little privacy is not a bad idea.
I beg not to be misunderstaood ooooo, if you cannot leave hubby's accounts alone, if you have fake Facebook accounts to monitor him daily then try and be fair by letting him have everything too including your mail accounts so that when your friends ask how you wear your menstrual cups, he'll reply that he helps you fix them in properly. We must be fair o, it's not you hiding yours and snooping on his.
Imagine hubby's friend sending a business mail or chat and then getting a reply from his wifey? ahn ahn
Privacy is good. But if he ask for my password I will give him but funny enough he no get that kind of time. But I hv his password oo n trust I chk his mails some times. Lol. Chichi
Aunty Eya lovely respond
I had always known my hubby's passwords and atm pins ever since we were dating, when we became sure we will get married, he knows mine too. The few times I logged into his fb accout was to help him upload new pictures taken with my phone. I read his mails and texts once in a while if i stumble on them while using his phones or laptop and i only reply his mails if it's from someone I know very well and I will first of all tell the person that it's me replying and I make sure I tell him that I chatted with that person. We even help each other to withdraw money from atm.
I feel couples should know each others passwords and atm pins, it kind of creats a bond (talking from my experience o) but we should never ever misuse the information because it was given based on trust.
@ Poster, where do you stand on this? Say your own na
I'm not yet married,but personally,I feel that there is no biggie,if he wants it,he can have it.if I want it,he shldnt have a problem giving it.some couples even make use of just one mobile phone.I can't do that of cause.lol.but really,I don't see any reason why I will want to be reading his mails..atm pin is different.
Marriage does not mean that we throw away our 'individuality" After all we still have our individual extended family and all. If my friend's husband replies her mail on her behalf when she is not ill eh, I won't mail her again o.
My husband's work: "Babe pls help me check my fb if I have any mail there. Babe help me reply my mails. Babe pls what is my xyz password. Babe where is my token/atm card". Why bother with social network? BlackBerry self, I go ping am taya, he no go answer me. Why buy the BlackBerry then? The guy no just send and honestly I'm kinda happy about it. Lol.
Abasiama
My husband's work: "Babe pls help me check my fb if I have any mail there. Babe help me reply my mails. Babe pls what is my xyz password. Babe where is my token/atm card". Why bother with social network? BlackBerry self, I go ping am taya, he no go answer me. Why buy the BlackBerry then? The guy no just send and honestly I'm kinda happy about it. Lol.
Abasiama
My dear me I don't want to know o. When I was dating hubby, I found his password and secretly checked only to find an email where he told a certain pussyispower@yahoo.com that he loved her id. OmO before I could get myself to stand up from that sit that day eh. People had to intervene.
Today, I have it secretly again. he suspects that I do but I deny it. He wants to gimmie but I told him not to bother cos for now he is clean. The day I logged on to his Skype see gbegen again. Ex girlfriend from 20 years ago asking for closure. forget I am not keen on that shit anymore.
I am very clean. But I will never give him mine. Not that he cares anyways.
PS:All na marriage.
On point
Well, I have all my hubby's passwords cos he always forgets. The only one he can remember are his yahoo mail password cos he uses it everyday. He doesn't have any of my passwords and i'm not volunteering them
This just reminded me of my ex..He wasn't in town and one day I decided to enter his fb account being that the password was my name, omo see gbege…serious proposal and marriage plans to another girl who was abroad, the girl asking if they could name their baby my name, apparently she had the password too,, Hmmm me just dumped his gold-digging lying arse and so did the girl.
Well if le boo wants my password, I'll give it to him, nothing to hide anyways.
Text
That's actually the better Way.. Lol
I don't know whether to cry or laugh at your comment.
My fiance did not password is phone o but d way d guy dey guide d phone pass password sef,he clears off is chats immediately.2days after my birthday I decided to transfer some of d pictures we took to my phone,he was asleep and out of curiousity I checked d pings dat entered after he went to bed,hmmm come and see#love u too baby,sweet dreams baby,can't wait to see u baby#frm two different girls,I give am space o…lol
My husband has my fb,twitter,email,atm password and sometimes I leave my fone with him and I also have all hs passwords and remind him to reply mails and wish hs frnds hbd on facebook.I feel its not a big deal.
My hubby does not pick my calls or read my Sms he doesn't knw my password, him no even care and I like it like dat. cos @times, me n my girlfriends have some private things to talk about. But I dey check him messages o once in a while Lol
I bookmarked my facebook page on my wife's tablet and she's been listening in since then. just recently she uploaded her pix on my page and passed a comment as if I was the one who wrote it. I guess she had one thing in mind. LET THEM KNOW HIS TAKEN. it doesn't mean a thing to me. she can have all the access she wants. cheers.
I only check hubby's mails when he asks me to. I have all his passwords including phone and I've never found anything.
I believe in having privacy so I think its wrong to respond to emails and texts without each others consent.
Some people r very good at covering their tracks and will delete every chat, email or text to avoid being caught.
Am not married yet but seriously, it is sometimes easy to say I'll give than do it. What I know won't hurt me! I can give him mine but I don't want his cuz I don't want something that will keep me thinking of how to plot one graph or something
Ahhhh! I do that a lot also fa! I have my husbands fb password and email, at times I also log in to his facebook and comment on my pics, just to let them really know his taken.ahhhh!
I had an exes password to his emails etc and the thing is because he trusted me with the info i never felt the need to check his inbox i only did so when he asked me. We eventually broke up because one of us was moving and me I don't do long distance oh we have an arrangement however that if we ever find ourselves permanently in the same location are both single and still feeling each other then we shall continue from where we stopped.
Una own better, I cldnt care less abt my husbands passwords or bbm.. But he feels its his God given right 2 read my chats with my frnds.. Female gossip or stuff abt their private lives.. Slapped me wen I ws even pregnant cos he ws looking @ my phone n I dragged it frm him. 1st time tho, if he ever tries it agn, I'm moving out.. With enough beg I forgave him, but d phone, no change. He enjoys d gossip, I've learnt 2 end my chats nw cos its nt fair 2 my frnds.. Wt is private shld b private.. @ least hv ur own space..
That's how it should be! Which one is "privacy" again with your spouse?
Your husband slapped you while pregnant?! WHAT?!
Exactly. well said
There is no reason for any spouse to need to have access to the others email and social media accounts, that is why you trust them, in trust there is no fear.. I think I read somewhere recently that many couples were opting to share one email account and social media page.
Hmmm except you are married don't try it, I once had a boyfriend I gave all my passwords too,we broke up and one day out of the blues wen we were no longer dating he called to ask why I changed my facebook password,omo see laughter ooooooooo to tink dat this ex was someone I forced to open his fb acct in the first place.if U r nt married its nt safe.
Bcos U are not transparent enuf and private discussion is not wise tru email abeg no scatter Ur friend family, as long as u don't keep secret from ur partner ur password shuld not be personal
No big deal about it abeg wen no be say ur partner is immature he can access all he or she can why keep secret. And some ladies here be lik I can't give him my password oooo but I have his or I secretly check his email , fb and co smhfu, marriage is about trust and trust is about transparency and transparency is about not hidding anything and d@ mean OURS not minem NB if u want to have secrets pls don't marry
Is that the only sentence you read in her comment?
Ozk, advise her to divorce him. Mtcheeewwwww
ANON12:36, YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT MARRIED. A LITTLE PRIVACY IS NECESSARY FOR A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP. IS IT EVERYTIME YOU WANT TO SEND SOMETHING TO YOUNGER SIBLINGS OR YOUR AGED PATENTS. THAT YOU INFORM DARLING HUSBAND?
YOU ARE EITHER NEWLY MARRIED OR NOT YET MARRIED.
AGED PARENTS.sorry for typos.
Barbie,you sound like one whose husband reads mails from her friends.Better stop cos it's not fair on your friends. You think if they discover your husband reads their mails they'll keep chatting with you.
Scroll up and see how poster felt so uncomfortable she had to reread her chats again just to be sure that she has not jam-talked. No woman will be comfortable knowing that her friend's hussy reads her chats with other friends.
Abeg stop forming and face reality.
Gbamest!!! You nailed it. WHAT IS TRUST if spouses must request for access into each other's mail accounts???
Exactly. If you can't let him have yours then why interested in his??????
If you truly trust your husband, you won't be asking for his mail account passwords.what for?
Smh! Some women sha, after they will say men are selfish.. You asked for & have access to his and he gave you, meanwhile you can not give him yours? Is that fair or transparent?
If u can't give urs then dnt ask for his. May be you all have skeleton in your cupboard? If u can't give urs then dnt collect his..
Life is give and take! Shikena..
ROTFLOL! What?!!! What will I not hear? Post ur pics on fb with ur hub's acc…then comment too! Omo…women are too much! I give una hand jare…
Anyway…having ur spouse's password for the sake of monitoring is a sign of lack of trust n insecurity.
Women, women women you beaches are the fakest! LOL, post with his account and comment with his name.
Oya carry go, nothing do Una jare
I wouldn't have any issues with allowing my hubby have my passwords.
Huby guards his fone like egg n me too,bt I dnt ve any skeleton in my cupboard,I do it cause he is doing it lol,abeg I get bigger problem Aunty Eya I need to table a very serious matter of Abuse,help your sister out am begging,I dnt noe how to send it.
send it to her mailbox and she post for you. it is cuulme@gmail.com
@ brandy we know boundaries and he is not jobless making it a duty to read my mails, so have a mature relationship and u will know what I mea.n transparency is wat marriage is all about . Ur partner shuld be able to advice on issues, ur no be my way. Date a mature person u will know wat I mean
Lol I'm blessed with a great man, I have access to his passwords emails social media etc he gave em willingly not bcuz of lack of trust but bcuz in the past when he needed to do sometn n he was too busy he had to get me to do it and that's always been the case and he has nvr asked for my passwords ever! Although he uses my iPad laptop etc and he can go into my social media mails etc cuz it's open!
Am only interested in his ATM card but he will rather give me his dormant acct card details.
OMG…..I'm laffing seriously over here at "OmO before I could get myself to stand up from that sit that day eh. People had to intervene". Well, i know dat feeling but i will rather snoop and know.
You guys are nice, keep it that way
I have my hubby, s email address only bcos I normally help him check or send his mails but that is because his mails are all strictly for business. He dosen,t allow me have access to his phone or ATM pin but likes to check my chats on my phone