Hello Aunty Eya, thank you so much for everything that I have learnt from your blog. I completed my NYSC not long ago and this life, I have read and learnt so many things from other readers’ stories, I never thought that a day like this will come when I’ll need Online help too. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and 5 months now. The majority of that
time we have really spent time together also except when I was away serving . We’ve had ups and downs that have led us to break up several times (his family doesn’t like me because I’m from a poor or should I call it humble background , his friends don’t like me for that same reason either). He’s my 2nd serious relationship, and I’m his first…everything.
Recently, he and I broke up because I’ve been very much absent while doing my Youth Service . We had tried to make time for each other, but we just constantly fought. So about four days ago he broke off with me (made me pack up my few stuff I kept in his apartment and leave, etc), saying he felt like I had left him during that period of absence
While we were broken up those four days I grew closer to one of the people I had been working on a little project with during my NYSC and found out he had liked me since the day we met. This guy and I really click, and he understands me more than I think my boyfriend does [or will ever]. There’s a few things about the other guy though that I know will never work out, and I love my boyfriend far too much to just give up on him. We started talking marriage before the break up.
Now we made up and am back with him, I Feel guilty as hell though, for even talking to another person despite the fact it was on a break up [which I thought was the real “end”]. I’ve told my boyfriend about the other guy, and that I’m not going to leave the protest. I’m worried about hurting one, or both of these guys. I love my boyfriend and I really truly care about the other guy.
I just don’t know how to tell the other guy that I’m back with my boyfriend and just want us to be friends. During the time my boyfriend and I were broken up, I told him I wasn’t ready for a relationship again…he told me that was ok, he’d wait around . I’m sorry if I’m rambling…I’m at my wits end now feeling like one bad girl dating two guys. I don’t know how to handle this.
You broke up with someone, met another man, yet still returned to the former. To me, that means you have made up your mind on who you want to be with. The issues that made you break up, have they been resolved? If not, they could lead to another breakup and you might not find the other guy still single and waiting o.
Does his family like you now? What of his friends? I hope these issues were resolved before you went back to him. Marriage is a big deal and atleast you need to know that most of the people that matter to him are rooting for you. If you are sure that everything is clear, then, go ahead and break off with the new guy but if it's not, then retrace your steps.
Exactly anty Eya and Anty Adaeze have asked d few important questions u need to answer. Your solutions are in d answers. Cheers