Let the new mom live and enjoy this mommy moment with her newborn son. What do we Nigerians really want sef? Remember how the questions kept pouring in? The comments very callous and mean… When are you getting married? Will you get married to your laptop? Are you going to make all that money with no child to call your own?
See ehn? If I were that very successful, stinking successful with
those flaming hot exotic cars in my garage, with houses in the best places in Nigeria, Owning Successful Businesses Online and Offline, earning money every second of the day, Owning world class Media Houses, with numerous employees at my beck and call and then,,, approaching 40 with no man bold enough to put a ring on this finger? Hmm, If I became a billionaire in my late 30s, I wouldn’t continue to wait and hope and beg. I will be bold and do something for God’s sake. I will plunge my net into the deep and catch what I need. I won’t sit down there and watch myself grow old and die lonely when I could have done something. …I will adopt a child if I can or give birth, yes! give birth to my own blood, to my DNA if my womb permits.
The battle always seem easy when we stand and watch others fight in the Boxing Ring. It’s easier when we get entertained by the fact that “oh, the life isn’t even perfect for her too, after all she doesn’t have it all either”.
If you see a rough path that leads to your dream world, won’t you take it? Will you bother your head about what people think? When the chips are down sis, will anyone care what others think? Leave that matter, there is really no one there, you are on your own in this life. You are running this race alone, just you and your God and if you like oh, prevent yourself from living your best life. If you like, allow what people, strangers will say to be your roadblock to awesomeness.
Marriage is really no longer what people thought. The world over, I pray the beautiful institution does not become extinct in the future. Honestly, in my country too, few women, only few can truly be honest about being happy in marriage. Only few can testify that the best time of their lives on this planet has been the years in marriage. If everyone is happily married, why the increased rate of cheating and lesbianism. The men are getting bolder with cheating, young side chickens, and withholding of affection from wifeys, the women are getting bolder with pretence and fakism while playing “the game”
Very few of us wives are truly happy, some feel trapped in our marriages already, some believe they would have been more successful in life if marriage wasn’t added to their agenda. A handful say they are still innit because divorce in Nigerian Courts does not favor the woman yet. Some wish we could turn back the hands of time, some are scared to be labeled “divorcee”some can’t bear to imagine what will happen to our kids if we leave. Some are consoling ourselves with the fact that it can be managed in as much as domestic violence isn’t involved. We turn a blind eye, we turn a deaf ear and then drop a burning tear. We see ‘happy people’ and just wish…
Then, some woman far away becomes successful and tries to live her life differently and we begin to cast stones because we cannot stand DIFFERENT. The world will be a better place if we try to be more accepting of people who chose different paths, who want a different kind of life. We women are the ones who judge each other even more, we make it difficult for other women to stand upright. We fight ourselves, we tear each other down rather than build and support and grow together. See, marriage is great, marriage is beautiful and wonderful but not everyone will get married. Period! Not everyone even cares.
Well, for me, I do not think that every woman must be someone’s wife. Some do not even want to get married, and they are adults, free to choose their paths and live their lives provided their methods do not cause harm or constitute danger to others. Some can’t live without a man to call husband and they are free, it’s a free world. Some can’t bear to not be called a Mrs someone, that’s their choice. Live And Let’s Live.
I used to be very judgemental because of the way that I was brought up but not anymore. Life is short and THIS is a free world. Everyone is different! No one should be forced to do same as others before they can be accepted and loved.
If your sister, your cousin, your daughter becomes super rich at 40, single and childless not because she is infertile. Dating, with no man bold enough to propose and walk A RICH AFRICAN WOMAN down the aisle, what would you advise her do?
Your super rich sweet sister finds out she is pregnant at 40, what would you honestly advise?
Can you ask her to abort a pregnancy at 40 because she isn’t wearing a ring given by a man?