I just turned 21. I’m a medical student. I just
discovered that I’m 4 weeks gone. I’m so scared of my parents. I can’t even imagine telling them. We live in Nigeria. They are very strict devout Catholics. My mom is the president of the mother’s association. I’ve been crying. I have no idea what to do. My boyfriend wants to see my people. I said he could go ahead but leave out the baby. I’m so tense. I have no idea how to deal with this. Please help me.
MY REPLY:
Congratulations dear At 21 you are an adult. Not a little girl anymore. I feel your Education is the main reason you are so scared because mum and Dad are responsible for that. You didn’t say anything about your boyfriend… Is he a student too?
STUDENT REPLIES:
discovered that I’m 4 weeks gone. I’m so scared of my parents. I can’t even imagine telling them. We live in Nigeria. They are very strict devout Catholics. My mom is the president of the mother’s association. I’ve been crying. I have no idea what to do. My boyfriend wants to see my people. I said he could go ahead but leave out the baby. I’m so tense. I have no idea how to deal with this. Please help me.
MY REPLY:
Congratulations dear At 21 you are an adult. Not a little girl anymore. I feel your Education is the main reason you are so scared because mum and Dad are responsible for that. You didn’t say anything about your boyfriend… Is he a student too?
STUDENT REPLIES:
I’m scared of breaking the news to them and how they will react. What if they cut me off? My boyfriend works in Nigeria. I’m due to travel to America around october ish to continue with my program and he won’t be traveling with me. He says he will be supportive but I know how much he earns and we all know the exchange rate now. With God I can manage but how to not get my parents to notice is my problem
From Omolola Princess Adetona (Facebook)
Hi, you just have to tell them look for people you believe your parents can listen too to talk to them calm yourself down they are some girls who are not up to your age who are also in the same situation they dint kill there selfs don't think of abortion ooo that will even worsen the situation I pray they take it has it come everything has a reason and thanks God your boyfriend accepted it just keep calm
Hello expectant mum. You are going to have your bundle of Joy while you are away studying in the United States, with no help, how are you planning on doing this. If your mum is not going to be there, combining studies, a first baby, financial and emotional responsibilities and aaaallll that, have you thought on how you are going to successfully pull through? Let's assume your parents don't make any trouble and just say "ok you are old enough to be a parent but we will only finance your studies, are you and your unborn baby's dad, ready?
Will you be taking the new baby along for classes? Will you be able to pay for a nanny or some help? You know the exchange rates now. Nigerian Laws do not support abortion and I can't advise you to. Well, for now,let him see your parents maybe, without talking about the pregnancy. You can talk with your parents later, whoever is the easier one to talk to. It's after talking with them that you'll know the next step to take. I'm worried too for you. Sha first thing now is to inform your parents.
As for the finances too, my partner and I can handle the baby's upkeep without my parents' help. His job pays well enough to cater for the child. But it's really bad timing as we're supposed to BA saving up for other stuff
Hi everyone. Thank you all for your contributions. Pertaining to how I plan on managing it I'm completely at a loss. Both my parents and his parents have jobs and are working so its not like they can quit their jobs. I've really thought about getting it out. It's 4 weeks today. I'll have no help. I can get a part time job to handle the financial costs and a nanny. But at some point I will have to tell my parents. That's the bridge I'm trying to cross now. Let me give you an example of how strict my dad is. He called me a certain time to change my Instagram username or to leave my surname out of my social media and delete all photos of my siblings. Just because of username. Don't get me started on my mom.😭
😳 Reading your replies now, I have a change of mind about you breaking the news to them now. It might be too much drama to handle and might affect your trip in October. I don't know what other readers think but for me, I think you should manage yourself as best you can and only tell them when you are far way or when the baby 👶 is born. As a parent, I would love to be the first person to know whatever happens to my child but we are all different. We all handle shock differently and I don't blame your parents nor you. You already have everything under control, do what you feel will not cause stress and won't harm anyone.
From Sheamapo Organics (Facebook)
So many questions to be answered here.
Do you think your boyfriend love you?
Do you truly love him?
What makes you think he is the right man for you?
That you are now pregnant will definitely prolong your study duration.
Are you ready for that?
You have no option other than to allow the guy to meet with your parents.
You MUST nurse the pregnancy to term.
Hello Medstudent,
It is really not easy to work school and take care of a child. I am a student with 2 kids, work part time as well. It is no fun. Finding a nanny is really expensive. Think through very well
😭😭😭😭😭
Thank you so much Aunty Eya. I'll think things through carefully and I'll keep you posted.
Thank you very much for your contribution. I really appreciate it. I really don't think I can handle it at all.