Good afternoon A-Eya, wc peope I hail o.I have been a reader of this blog but have never wrote to A-Eya before. Wells I got married early 2013. My husband is ten years older than me and I don’t really understands him any longer he comes home very late, sometimes around 11pm past 12 etc and I was pregnant all this time and have been receiving threat messages from his female lover telling me I will loss my baby that am not the only one pregnant for my own husband and I showed my so called husband the messages but he said he does not know who is sending the messages to me and that I should never in my life show him the messages again,and I was already heavily pregnant so I have to go and see one of his friend told him he knew my husband was cheating and he never advised my husband so l left the guys place so I guess the friend called him on the phone and told him I came so my husband started calling me but I did not pick cos have already packed some
of my things to go back to my parent place because I was new in the place where me and my husband stays so he sent me a message telling me he was sorry for the thing of shame he caused the family but I did nt reply his message.
But after I left he was still seeing the girl later one of his friend called me gave me my husband girl friend number, told me the girl is a prostitute and that she leave in an hotel and when I called her I spoke to her normally and she said she is dating him and I asked her what she does for a living and she said I know already because my husband told her I already know she is a prostitute and she said she was sorry and I asked her if she loves my husband and she said she loves him so when my husband got to know have gotten the girls number he was now saying they are just friends and nothing more.
but the real issues is that have put to bed and I don’t kn what to do cos am tired and want out of the marriage but my child pls hide my identity thanks
of my things to go back to my parent place because I was new in the place where me and my husband stays so he sent me a message telling me he was sorry for the thing of shame he caused the family but I did nt reply his message.
But after I left he was still seeing the girl later one of his friend called me gave me my husband girl friend number, told me the girl is a prostitute and that she leave in an hotel and when I called her I spoke to her normally and she said she is dating him and I asked her what she does for a living and she said I know already because my husband told her I already know she is a prostitute and she said she was sorry and I asked her if she loves my husband and she said she loves him so when my husband got to know have gotten the girls number he was now saying they are just friends and nothing more.
but the real issues is that have put to bed and I don’t kn what to do cos am tired and want out of the marriage but my child pls hide my identity thanks
You know the drill, either stay with him and keep praying for him to change for the next 30 years (by which time he would have had countless more kids outside, plus the HIV he might have given you from the prostitutes) or man-up and leave.
Nne i know a lot of wc members will not agree with me, but if you are financially independent and you have parents who love and support you, LEAVE THIS MAN. If you are not, plan your exist and make sure you dont get pregnant again. Life is too short to get involved with this kind of rubbish. and this is just the beginning.
Unless you believe in praying for someone who will not change, he is an old man, he is set in his ways and WILL NOT CHANGE. Then again if you noticed this behavior before you married him (then i am shaking my head at you). Its up to you.
Your husband sleeps with a prostitute… and sleeps with you as well? that one na communal sleeping o! Lol… on a serious note, pls take ur leave… listen… if u stay because of the baby, what gives you the assurance that he will not infect you with an std or the much dreaded HIV! my God! Will you then be alive to take care of your child? Pls be wise…
Your husband sleeps with a prostitute… and sleeps with you as well? that one na communal sleeping o! Lol… on a serious note, pls take ur leave… listen… if u stay because of the baby, what gives you the assurance that he will not infect you with an std or the much dreaded HIV! my God! Will you then be alive to take care of your child? Pls be wise…
so sorry poster. but let me ask for how long shall we keep running from husbands that cheat? pls how many men does not cheat? (maybe 2 out of hundred,) and what if u are not lucky enough to have such as a husband? leaving your marriage this early is not good as for me ooh. I also got married last year 2013. my husband was still very much into his ex,( my proof was the texts they exchange and London minutes calls)I never even confronted my husband for once neither do I bother to call the woman in question who was more than aware that we are married. I can't say for sure if he is sleeping with her or not. all I do was go to God in prayers to scatter what ever they share be it love, sex, friendship anything, and God answered my prayers. my sister my advice for u is pray endlessly for God to show u the way that is best for u and ur little baby, whether to go or stay. after all are u so sure the next man will be a saint? as for HIV and others , is your husband that careless as to infect himself? who does not know that prostitutes are public dogs set to destroy homes! some men sha!
* long minutes calls* typo errors.
i agree with@kiky a 110% percent. i beg after this ur first baby waka fast before u get an infection or something. i believe in the power of prayer but somethings cant be changed
I wouldnt say you should divorce him but I would advice you leave for a while and pray! Pray very hard but in the mean time do not have any contact with him or the lady and focus on your baby. The Lord is your strength
Hmmmmmm. Nothing prayer can't do. Just pray and not only pray u must believe DAT God has answered u.
God can answer prayers but not d way we think he will.. ur husband is not going to change, stay @ your own risk.. he's sleeping with a prostitute, since u r pregnant u must have done hiv test.. meanwhile we have other deadly STI's if u want to risk your life, stay. D rate @ which married women have STI's and hiv is alarming..
I wouldn't advice you to divorce, although biblical, we can divorce on the ground of sexual immorality, but its not the best, what I would advice is to separate from him, like give the marriage a break, be independent, take care of your baby, have nothing to do with him sexually and live away from him, but don't stop praying for him, because he is still your husband, this might go on for like years, so you have to be strong, courageous and don't give-up, there is nothing God can not do, God can make him change for the better, after sometime, I am positive he will come to his senses and realise what he has lost, then come looking for you.
Please don't forget to make him go for test before having anything to do with him sexually again, that's if he finally comes back in future.
Please don't divorce now, because your marriage is still too young, I would have told you to divorce if violence Was involved irrespective of how young the marriage is. So just take a break for now
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Dis one pass me oooooh! Did I hear u say call girl? Dating? I can't stand……..
10year gap is not too much, esp if you are under 25.
The challenge with most ladies is that they do not follow God’s instruction on the issue of who they should marry and end up marrying guys merely out of LUST or DESPERATION. When the bad begin to show up, the single ladies will be the first to advice divorce/separation!
Is there anything in you that still wants to make your marriage work? If yes, there’s hope… ask God for wisdom. Seek counsel from more experienced people who have understanding of what a successful home means. Don’t talk to his friends; esp the ones that encourage his acts. Are there other respectable family members that you can talk to? I think your marriage is worth fighting for – don’t let the devil win this battle!
another fish brained reply….na by force to stay married will you die if you leave will your husband and marriage help you make heaven please even the Bible makes provisions for divorce on the grounds of adultery. Stay there let us not read your story on here soon. Women with low self esteem and insecurity issues plenty for hia
Here are my tips…. 1) Do not leave, all men are cheats on the ones caught becomes the victim. 2) Avoid having sex with him, for whatever it takes… Just quit that part of your marriage obligation. 3) Stay focused, Give the marriage the best, be happy and let him see it that you are happy without him. 4) Have a best friend in Jesus, if you have ever doubted faith, then it's time to switch on to it, Only Faith can change your Fate! 5) Assume you not alone in this, the fact loads of women are living with such promiscous men, but the irony is some men are smarter than the other. Be Wise Mrs, Nuff'Said!
Dis ur reply is contradicting. How is she supposed to be happy and give the marriage her best if she quits having sex with her husband? He would obviously keep getting it from outside and can even graduate to bringing them home. Biko @ poster if u would follow this advice u might as well stay away for a while.
Dis ur reply is contradicting. How is she supposed to be happy and give the marriage her best if she quits having sex with her husband? He would obviously keep getting it from outside and can even graduate to bringing them home. Biko @ poster if u would follow this advice u might as well stay away for a while.
stephanie you are very stupid for posting this here o
Alot of pple ont think before they type or talk u said she should be happy and still be infront of a man that once swore d world to u!ita easier said cos many of these pple have never been in the posters shoes.
PLS ADVICER U SEE D FIRST PARA OF UR REPLY NAH DIS POSTER DOES NOT DESERVE TO B HEARING DIS ITS VERY UNFORTUNATE DAT U DIDNT LISTEN TO URSELF B4 TYPE. HAVE U FORGOTTEN HOSEA IN D BIBLE ?D FACT DAT SHE'S HAVING CHALLENGES DOEANT MEAN SHE DIDNT FOLLOW GOD'S INSTRUCTION EXCEPT U DONT UNDERSTAND UR BIBLE. SAYIN MANY WOMEN DONT SEEK THE COUNSEL OF GOD HOW DID U KNOW WER U DER WHEN SHE PRAYED AND FASTED?I GOT MARRIED LATE WAITED ON THE LORD AND I WAS CONVINCED AND MIND U IM A VERY PRETTY LADY SO ITS NOT LIKE MEN WER NOT COMIN FINALLY MARRIED A SOO CALLED BORN AGAIN ND EVEN CHOIR MASTER AND YET WHAT DO I GET? ABEGI
u r a big fool, ma Eya comment like dz should b deleted
@ Anon 11:03 AM – Advices given are meant for all to learn – not directly at the Poster. There are also specific ones for the poster… There are challenges in every home but one thing that would keep us standing is when God is in the equation. In Hosea case – God was in the equation and there’s why it did not end a tragedy. It’s important to note that born again has nothing to do with being a choir master or even a pastor. The bible says that by their fruit we shall know them. What fruit? Galatians 5:22,23 provided the answer.
If God is in the equation as you said, I guaranty you that your marriage will be sweet again – His Word NEVER fail!I
Some people just amaze me,honestly am sure u noticed some or a little of what your husband is portraying now buh u refused to open ur eyes because u wanted a husband by force,now your complaining. Pls oo,dont complan,stay there,cos marriage is for better for worse… you have to carry your cross my dear. Am sure your husband didn't just start this habit. That is y they say shine your eyes well b4 u enter,no 1 is perfect YES! But some are better than most. My candid advice for you is to go back to God and ask for forgiveness and help for He is ever ready to help you. Then with that faith,go back to your husband and stand by him,fight for your home,because my dear the truth is GOOD men are relatively scarce! Work with the one you have now and turn him worthy of you,because trust me,It's hard,but it requires hard work to be a strong woman! God is ur muscle!
Some people just amaze me,honestly am sure u noticed some or a little of what your husband is portraying now buh u refused to open ur eyes because u wanted a husband by force,now your complaining. Pls oo,dont complan,stay there,cos marriage is for better for worse… you have to carry your cross my dear. Am sure your husband didn't just start this habit. That is y they say shine your eyes well b4 u enter,no 1 is perfect YES! But some are better than most. My candid advice for you is to go back to God and ask for forgiveness and help for He is ever ready to help you. Then with that faith,go back to your husband and stand by him,fight for your home,because my dear the truth is GOOD men are relatively scarce! Work with the one you have now and turn him worthy of you,because trust me,It's hard,but it requires hard work to be a strong woman! God is ur muscle!
Eya i still wonder y u keep allowing all dz spell shit, belive me it dosen't tell gud of ur blog. How do u enjoy a marriage or relationship by using spell? dat means d woman will use d man like ten nd eleven spanner. e dey like say u dey encourage d spell tine.
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Those are SPAM comments. Not allowed at all. I take them down as soon as they are spotted.
Anon 10:06 ur head dey dia, I'm with you 100%
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So you don't know that some men are careless and will even sleep with a prostitute without condoms. You are telling this woman to hope her husband does not bring disease to her. wow
I will advice you to go and get tested. You may never know. As for the poster i will advice you stay away from your husband for now. tell him about your baby and keep praying about it. let him come and apologies to you and then take you and the baby back, by then he must have left the other woman and this i believe prayers can do. I won't advice you to divorce but keep praying and He will come back for you.