Good day aunty Eya, pls I want to ask the WC family if it’s bad that I left my hubby because of his serial cheating with several women and also cos of the insults from his sisters tagging me a gold digger.
The worst is
that any time I confront him, he insults or sometimes slaps me and tells me that those girls are better than me. There is this particular girl he’s been sleeping with for over 3yrs but aside her he has so many girls that I have lost count of.
I left mainly because he refused to change after my family and his friends spoke to him about it.
Thanks for advise.
The worst is
that any time I confront him, he insults or sometimes slaps me and tells me that those girls are better than me. There is this particular girl he’s been sleeping with for over 3yrs but aside her he has so many girls that I have lost count of.
I left mainly because he refused to change after my family and his friends spoke to him about it.
Thanks for advise.
how can you question your decision to leave? the man is an animal. he cheats on you serially, beats you, says the bitches he cheats on you with are better than you and you are still wondering if you made the right decision. if you have kids, just make sure they see their father constantly so that they are not affected by your problems. be self sufficient, work on your self, both physically and emotionally, don't dress like an old woman, but stay classy. change your outlook towards life, with time, you will realize that he is not the centre of your universe.
Aunty is it until he gives you an STD or worse AIDS that you will know that you are supposed to leave?
I wonder o. Dis our soceity, I'm a health worker and the rate @ which married women have AIDS is alarming, u see fire but u still want to die inside jst because d soceity will look @ u somehow forgetting about yourself and ur children, @ d end of d day d woman will even die before the man. U did the right thing.. Stop thinking about it
I hardly support women leaving their marriages but in your case, It's wise that you left. As anon said above, 'the rate @ which married women have AIDS is alarming.' Don't waste your life over an unappreciative husband. Wish you all the best.
YES it is wrong to leave your husband because of infidelity… If all women leave for this reason, more than 90% of married couples would be separated. Would God be happy with those that left?
Sure you knew he was cheating before you married him… Many single ladies reading this script are guilty of having courtship with men that sleep around and will still chose to get engaged to these men – what do you call this?
I hope you weighed the consequences of your action as this is not an easy decision to make? However, there’s nothing wrong to leave return option open, especially if there could be some genuine change of heart.
However, you need to sort some other things out; e.g.
1. Relationship with the sisters
2. Your not doing something – they would call you ‘gold digger’ cos you’re idle.
3. Upgrade yourself – why would your hubby insult you and tell you others are better…
Lol, if u r a woman u really have to work on ur self esteem.. There DV, cheating, inlaws hate u, is dt not d recipe for an early grave? Didn't u read d part of d family interferance yet no change? Soceity!! Till death do us part, her death abi, plssss
thumps up for that decision.dont ever regret it.even if he comes back begging on his knees,make sure he goes for a comprehensive bodily test b4 accepting him back if at all u will probably with a public apology.pls forgive me but ur husb,ex,whatever is a beast
Its a very good decision you made both for now and the future.Above all,while being separated from him,always pray that God should open his eyes and that God should put enmity btw him and those ladies because some of dose ladies might have given him something and it was because he passed his boundary.Wishing you the best
ADEYANJU
Nice to see the commentators on here well apart from BJ speaking with one voice. Poster AIDS is real ooo that is all I will say
This is the hardest decision a woman in such a marriage makes and you've done it! Kudos to you. Please dear, stay out because if you go back, it will be 10-fold worse. There's nothing in that marriage for you.
Now, i wonder who is telling you that it was a bad decision, pls don't let that person's words get to you. Be strong.
@Anon 12:21pm… Are all these enough reasons to leave? I would not advocate separation except the situation is getting out of hand, e.g. violence. Obviously the hubby does not respect her family in this case. She needs to identify someone she could talk to that the husband respects – if there's none, she don enter one chance!
FYI – I'm not a woman…
So her husband beating her is not violence? Also I'm sure you skipped that verse in the bible that advocates for divorce on the basis of infidelity.
is BJ the husband?
i read your comment and was like "is she for real"? then you said u r not a woman and i thought no wonder. only a woman will understand well enough. what else do you want to happen before she leaves? death? btw, like anon 6:05 asked, are you the culprit?
I read this post and I am thinking, what happens to the love 2people profess on the altar? Why will a man resort to hitting his wife? The bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh. Why will a man say the concubines are better than his better half? And them the sisters who wouldn't give u peace.
One thing is for sure most serial cheating men only return to their wives either when they are old or have an infection. Poster if you are at peace with your decision then be happy with it. Also try and go for hiv testing just 2be sure. All the best.
Hummm my own hubby cheats for Africa but he is extra nice to me. Am plotting my departure from dis marriage cos I don't want to die from his!
as 4 me o i dnt think wat u did is wrong but u must nt remarry sha according to bible standard.
Hiv
Does she have to have an STD before Oga BJ decides it is ok to leave? A man that demeans u is not worth your time.
Agreed – a man that demeans u is not worth your time… We are talking about the husband here! How many women still hang on with such hubby, hoping and praying for a turn around? Life will always throw challenges on you and only those that are able to stand till the end will have testimonies.
@ Precious – I'm not an advocate for domestic violence and will support a separation under such, but the Poster did not paint a picture of domestic violence. We might say he slaps (not beat) her sometimes, which is not good – is that domestic violence?
Women – how many of your husbands do sleep around and you know but still hang on? The surprising thing is that we (ladies) know their man sleeps around before getting hooked and we go ahead – you expect him to change, esp when it was obvious that you won by being better in bed before marriage?
Poster – my advice is that you weigh your decision again. If you’re at peace, bingo! If not, consider talking to someone respected by hubby and seek reconciliation. You never know – you might just be the savior the Lord has sent to your husband.
Dear poster, your decision to leave was a good one. I actually have an uncle that infected his wife with HIV due to his promiscous way. Of course he is sorry and sober afterwards but the deed has beeen done. Better safe than sorry dear. And again, this guy is violent. Slapping your wife which i assume cant always be behind in the the kids is sending a very bad signal and example to them. You need to protect them from that. That been said, if you feel he is sober and repentant, then you can retrace you step otherwise ma, stay off!!
Anon 6:20 AM, hmmmm DR OKORO!
Please these 419ers have also come here. Please we know you're 419 people, leave our blog for us Dr Okoro and Obantala
Thanks to u all for your advice. @BJ I didn't want 2 emphasis on the details but a man who @ any little misunderstanding carries knife 2 stab me on two diffrent occasions even took out his loaded gun b4 I ran out of the house with my kids.its a long story indeed. I am good looking so my appearance is not d problem, I also run a biz but d problem is that my sis n law lives with us that's why I ave dat problem with her. Thanks 2 u all. A friend in need is a friend indeed. WC fam is a blog too be. POSTER
@Poster, the extra info helps… It's better you left. All the best – God will give you beauty for ashes, ni oruko Jesu!
@Bj, thanks. Amin
Is wa, Men pls poster borrow leg n leave abeg
since you have known his infidelity, what are you damn waiting for?
You were most def right to leave. Even if things will be patched, let it be from afar. Stay strong because I know people will castigate you for your decision but na your life, not theirs. There is no marriage in heaven biko.
Hmm.. someone dat cheats serially exposing me to killer diseases attacks me with knife twice, points a loaded gun at me and I will still be remaining there talking rubbish??? May God forbid. When my head is still on my neck. For you that are saying she should remain and endure till she is finally killed, maybe it should happen to your sister or your daughter so u will see how it is. Mscheww.