Hi WC, whenever my hubby wants to make love, I make myself available no matter what but whenever I approach him for such, he blatantly refuses. I want to know if its wrong for me to ask. Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN
Its not bad at all!!!It saddens my heart anytime I see a post from women about how their husbands disrespect them. I am not married and in my early 20’s and yet I feel their pains while I read about the problems in their marriage. From these posts it seems to me that these women love and will do anything to keep their marriages but the trend I’m seeing from the men scares me a lot. Why would a man exchange vows with a woman and beat her up or cheat? After the labor pains why would a man threaten a woman if she doesn’t bear a male child? Is she the creator of the baby? This is something out of her control and you’re causing depression for her! I am not a feminist but there is another trend I see generally when some women say, “he promised to marry me” I do not think marriage should be forced or you are forcing yourself into depression. A wise man once said, “Being single is better than being lied to, cheated on and disrespected” I also really don’t like it when female’s say, “men will always cheat” I feel that is creating a chance for them and more of them to cheat. I’ve heard advices from mature minds and they say you’ll see signs in the guy you are dating. Does that mean most of the women that are complaining about how their husbands are misbehaving did not see the bad signs or what? I feel young females need to be educated about these things, learning from other people’s experiences and avoiding it all together. Please can the women in the house shed some light on this issue? As young women what should we watch out for?
This is why it is important for one to commit marriage into Gods hands because I always say that you can date a person for 10 yeas but you cannot know the person inside out neither can you know what the person will change into only God knows. My husband is not perfect but when I read some stories here I thank God! But my sister I know the kind of prayers I prayed and the fasting I did and I held on tight to God
Aunty Eya pls help o,am sorry for postikg ds tru here,i neee urgent advice before i die of crying, i jst found out today dat my husband of 8mnth is gay. what shld i do,am jst 25yrs old.
"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control"
So according to God who instituted marriage, from this verse you are not wrong
If you and your husband are Christian, just tell him one day that you want to read a place in the bible you found interesting, then read this bible verse to him, with tears in your, (when I say tears in your eyes, I mean you need to add emotion to it, you need to be emotional, because that will help to drive home your point) kneel down, tell him how you feel, and how you always feel bad anytime he turns you down, how hurting you are right now, and you always feel bad because you love him, if you don't love him, you would have felt less concerned, put your pride aside and beg him to please stop doing that to you
Because Really sex is one of the major courses of divorce this days, so you need to device a way to make him give you sex anytime you want it, and sometimes you don't need to say it directly with mouth, you learn to seduce him to having sex with you, that's probably the best way, you are the woman, you should be in-charge, learn the act of powerful seduction, to seduce your husband to have sex with you God help you dear!
Anon 3:16, you have spoken well. But what do u mean by "I am not a feminist"? Do u know the real, noble meaning of feminism? I suggest u use ur dictionary or Google & understand the real meaning of feminism. If u are not a feminist, thenall ur words up there are contradictions & Iit means u are in support of women being treated like shit. Like I said, look up the word n decide where u stand as a woman. Thank u. *from a proud ffeminist*
Haba what would it cost you to write proper english? This is so pathetic. About your husband, there's really nothing Eya, you or anyone else can do to change his sexual orientation. This is what happens when you force people to love what they don't. They pretend. I'm sorry you fell a victim.
Yes what the matured minds told you that you will see signs in the guy you are dating is true, absolutely true, although you might not get to see all the signs or know the person very well, but you sure will see some danger signs, the truth is that most women see this danger signs but lack the will power to quit the relationship early enough, I have been privileged to advice so many young ladies, and I see this pathern repeatedly, they find it difficult to quit, they tell you things like;
"he loves me, he will change, I love him etc"
and they will find it difficult to quite that relationship, I don't know why women keep giving themselves false hope, and like deceiving themselves?
@anon 5:02, wat will it cost u to be more sympathetic? Somebody's life has just turned upside down (or so it seems) and u are attacking her grammer. My sister, it is sad, ur story. My advise is if you are in love with him, stay put and pray him out. Yes, prayer works. But if it is a situation you cannot condone, you may want to leave on the ground that this is an integral part of who he is and yet, he didnt reveal it to you before marriage. Dont take any decisions in a hurry. Prayerfully weigh ur options. Is there any child involved? POSTER, ther is nothing dialogue wont solve.dnt wake him in the middle of the nite to talk o. It scares the *hit out of them some times. Whenever u guys are in a light mood, just playfully ask him why he does that and tel him how it affects you. Hope this helps.
Anon 7:25 it's either 'you are very stupid' or 'you're very stupid'. It's either 'I am begging' or 'I'm begging'. Please go back to school. And yes, I am the very stupid Anon 5:02.
Poster, As I no get experience, I dnt know what to say But I think u shd sit ur hubby down and let him know how u feel. He might not see what he is doing as bad. And he might be the type of man dat believes that a woman has no ryt to ask for sex. Jus pour out ur mind in a calm and composed manner. And if he doesn't change… Try PLAN B!
To the original poster,initiating sex is not bad but it depends on how you do it.Since your husband doesn't like it,use style to initiate it.Buy very nice scented soap and lotion for when you feel raunchy.When he's eating,flirt with him. Wear something low necked so you can bend over and show your cleavage. Keep playing with your dress but do everything subtly,nothing too obvious. after just keep acting one kind, seductively and you can bet you'll get some that night. His boy must respond. Don't just make all these obvious. It never fails, trust me. I do it all the time, lol
Dont be afraid u can still go back to your parents. Plz leave that marriage. Pple will say he will change but are u ready to spend d rest of ur life wondering if its true? Also consider ur health. Gay pple hardly use condom cos there is no fear of pregnancy, HIV is easily transferable during gay sex. u r tooo young to die. pls leave nd dont think bout wat others will say.
@Anon 3:16pm, there are good men out there & you'll see the signs when you meet them. The good men actually get better with marriage… In the same way you're feeling, most of them are heart broken by the things they see/hear about women. Two advices for you: 1. Marry a Christian that loves God. He cannot know how to love/care for you if he does not adore God. 2. Do not marry a man that does not have someone he respects and would listen to – this could be a pastor, family, friend… Must be someone that has an understanding of God's mind concerning marriage. .. Ensure you have some level of relationship with this person. Back to POSTER – asking your husband for sex is good. The way you ask determines the kind of response you might get. How would you feel being asked for sex by your husband when you're in a bad mood caused by him and he ignored your feeling by demanding for sex? Men get moved by what they see – what physical attraction drives your husband crazy? You can also massage his ego and let him then do the chasing… Prepare the ground for him to make the moves…
Anon 4:38. You're only 25. You should leave now because you will never be able to trust your husband and he will always be gay and your health is at risk. I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Get the marriage annulled and after time, pray for the right man to come along. Take your time and be prayerful. God will guide the way. Your still very young. HE WILL NOT TURN STRAIGHT, HE WILL ALWAYS BE GAY.
i believe in marriage you should be open enough with your spouse to be able to initiate sex when u feel like it. If he is not in the mood sometimes that's understandable but for him to refuse u all the time is just plain selfish on his part and shows he's not sensitive to your needs.
Inform your parents to call a meeting with his family and then return the bride price. Walk away with your life and health intact. The emotions will heal in a few years. You can pray for him after you have left the marriage, but don't stay there, abeg!
Yes prayer works, but being gay isn't a sickness and he can not healed from it. It is who he is. So if u want to remain with him, fine, but just know that he desires men.
Ofcourse it is not wrong he should also make himself available as instructed in the bible as his body is not his but yours
Its not bad at all!!!It saddens my heart anytime I see a post from women about how their husbands disrespect them. I am not married and in my early 20’s and yet I feel their pains while I read about the problems in their marriage. From these posts it seems to me that these women love and will do anything to keep their marriages but the trend I’m seeing from the men scares me a lot. Why would a man exchange vows with a woman and beat her up or cheat? After the labor pains why would a man threaten a woman if she doesn’t bear a male child? Is she the creator of the baby? This is something out of her control and you’re causing depression for her!
I am not a feminist but there is another trend I see generally when some women say, “he promised to marry me” I do not think marriage should be forced or you are forcing yourself into depression. A wise man once said, “Being single is better than being lied to, cheated on and disrespected” I also really don’t like it when female’s say, “men will always cheat” I feel that is creating a chance for them and more of them to cheat.
I’ve heard advices from mature minds and they say you’ll see signs in the guy you are dating. Does that mean most of the women that are complaining about how their husbands are misbehaving did not see the bad signs or what? I feel young females need to be educated about these things, learning from other people’s experiences and avoiding it all together. Please can the women in the house shed some light on this issue? As young women what should we watch out for?
ITS NOT WRONG DARLING! WATCH THIS SPACE…www.bride2mum.com, I shall be talking about sex soon
This is why it is important for one to commit marriage into Gods hands because I always say that you can date a person for 10 yeas but you cannot know the person inside out neither can you know what the person will change into only God knows. My husband is not perfect but when I read some stories here I thank God! But my sister I know the kind of prayers I prayed and the fasting I did and I held on tight to God
Aunty Eya pls help o,am sorry for postikg ds tru here,i neee urgent advice before i die of crying, i jst found out today dat my husband of 8mnth is gay. what shld i do,am jst 25yrs old.
1 Corinthians 7:3-5
"The husband should fulfill his marital duty to
his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
The wife does not have authority over her own
body but yields it to her husband. In the same
way, the husband does not have authority over
his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not
deprive each other except perhaps by mutual
consent and for a time, so that you may devote
yourselves to prayer. Then come together again
so that Satan will not tempt you because of your
lack of self-control"
So according to God who instituted marriage, from this verse you are not wrong
If you and your husband are Christian, just tell him one day that you want to read a place in the bible you found interesting, then read this bible verse to him, with tears in your, (when I say tears in your eyes, I mean you need to add emotion to it, you need to be emotional, because that will help to drive home your point) kneel down, tell him how you feel, and how you always feel bad anytime he turns you down, how hurting you are right now, and you always feel bad because you love him, if you don't love him, you would have felt less concerned, put your pride aside and beg him to please stop doing that to you
Because Really sex is one of the major courses of divorce this days, so you need to device a way to make him give you sex anytime you want it, and sometimes you don't need to say it directly with mouth, you learn to seduce him to having sex with you, that's probably the best way, you are the woman, you should be in-charge, learn the act of powerful seduction, to seduce your husband to have sex with you
God help you dear!
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Anon 3:16, you have spoken well. But what do u mean by "I am not a feminist"? Do u know the real, noble meaning of feminism? I suggest u use ur dictionary or Google & understand the real meaning of feminism. If u are not a feminist, thenall ur words up there are contradictions & Iit means u are in support of women being treated like shit. Like I said, look up the word n decide where u stand as a woman. Thank u. *from a proud ffeminist*
Haba what would it cost you to write proper english? This is so pathetic. About your husband, there's really nothing Eya, you or anyone else can do to change his sexual orientation. This is what happens when you force people to love what they don't. They pretend. I'm sorry you fell a victim.
Yes what the matured minds told you that you will see signs in the guy you are dating is true, absolutely true, although you might not get to see all the signs or know the person very well, but you sure will see some danger signs, the truth is that most women see this danger signs but lack the will power to quit the relationship early enough, I have been privileged to advice so many young ladies, and I see this pathern repeatedly, they find it difficult to quit, they tell you things like;
"he loves me, he will change, I love him etc"
and they will find it difficult to quite that relationship, I don't know why women keep giving themselves false hope, and like deceiving themselves?
Your comment will be visible after approval
Anon 502 ur very stupid does d english matter nw, I 2 knw. Aunty eya pls make ds. Issue a post pls. Am beggin on her behalf
@anon 5:02, wat will it cost u to be more sympathetic? Somebody's life has just turned upside down (or so it seems) and u are attacking her grammer. My sister, it is sad, ur story. My advise is if you are in love with him, stay put and pray him out. Yes, prayer works. But if it is a situation you cannot condone, you may want to leave on the ground that this is an integral part of who he is and yet, he didnt reveal it to you before marriage. Dont take any decisions in a hurry. Prayerfully weigh ur options. Is there any child involved? POSTER, ther is nothing dialogue wont solve.dnt wake him in the middle of the nite to talk o. It scares the *hit out of them some times. Whenever u guys are in a light mood, just playfully ask him why he does that and tel him how it affects you. Hope this helps.
Anon 7:25 it's either 'you are very stupid' or 'you're very stupid'. It's either 'I am begging' or 'I'm begging'. Please go back to school. And yes, I am the very stupid Anon 5:02.
Poster,
As I no get experience, I dnt know what to say
But I think u shd sit ur hubby down and let him know how u feel.
He might not see what he is doing as bad.
And he might be the type of man dat believes that a woman has no ryt to ask for sex.
Jus pour out ur mind in a calm and composed manner.
And if he doesn't change…
Try PLAN B!
To the original poster,initiating sex is not bad but it depends on how you do it.Since your husband doesn't like it,use style to initiate it.Buy very nice scented soap and lotion for when you feel raunchy.When he's eating,flirt with him. Wear something low necked so you can bend over and show your cleavage. Keep playing with your dress but do everything subtly,nothing too obvious. after just keep acting one kind, seductively and you can bet you'll get some that night. His boy must respond. Don't just make all these obvious. It never fails, trust me. I do it all the time, lol
Anon 4:38, I am sorry for being so insensitive towards you.
Pray what out bikonu.
Anon 4.38 run for ur life. Its grounds for annulment.
u r too young to suffer this.
pls dnt bring in kids yet.
Dont be afraid u can still go back to your parents. Plz leave that marriage.
Pple will say he will change but are u ready to spend d rest of ur life wondering if its true?
Also consider ur health.
Gay pple hardly use condom cos there is no fear of pregnancy, HIV is easily transferable during gay sex.
u r tooo young to die.
pls leave nd dont think bout wat others will say.
my friend u no get experience? Hw?
1000 likes! Well sum men are just being selfish cos of african man mentality. Mtchewww.
@Anon 3:16pm, there are good men out there & you'll see the signs when you meet them. The good men actually get better with marriage… In the same way you're feeling, most of them are heart broken by the things they see/hear about women. Two advices for you:
1. Marry a Christian that loves God. He cannot know how to love/care for you if he does not adore God.
2. Do not marry a man that does not have someone he respects and would listen to – this could be a pastor, family, friend… Must be someone that has an understanding of God's mind concerning marriage. .. Ensure you have some level of relationship with this person.
Back to POSTER – asking your husband for sex is good. The way you ask determines the kind of response you might get. How would you feel being asked for sex by your husband when you're in a bad mood caused by him and he ignored your feeling by demanding for sex? Men get moved by what they see – what physical attraction drives your husband crazy? You can also massage his ego and let him then do the chasing… Prepare the ground for him to make the moves…
Since he doesn't Lyk u makin d move 4 sex,(whc I wonder y) den jst subtly seduce him. Dat shld wrk
As I never marry I no get experience now.
Na pple wey don marry go know how e dey go.
Anon 4:38. You're only 25. You should leave now because you will never be able to trust your husband and he will always be gay and your health is at risk. I'm so sorry this has happened to you. Get the marriage annulled and after time, pray for the right man to come along. Take your time and be prayerful. God will guide the way. Your still very young. HE WILL NOT TURN STRAIGHT, HE WILL ALWAYS BE GAY.
i believe in marriage you should be open enough with your spouse to be able to initiate sex when u feel like it. If he is not in the mood sometimes that's understandable but for him to refuse u all the time is just plain selfish on his part and shows he's not sensitive to your needs.
Inform your parents to call a meeting with his family and then return the bride price. Walk away with your life and health intact. The emotions will heal in a few years. You can pray for him after you have left the marriage, but don't stay there, abeg!
Yes prayer works, but being gay isn't a sickness and he can not healed from it. It is who he is. So if u want to remain with him, fine, but just know that he desires men.
Mrs c,pls what do u mean by "scented soap" and pls can you give names?
Just found out dis page&im so in love.
Mrs c,pls what do u mean by "scented soap" and pls can you give names?
Just found out dis page&im so in love.